


Luckiest Inkling in the World

by aidyr



Category: Splatoon
Genre: Explicit Language, F/F, Fluff, Hospitalization, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Lesbian Cephalopods (Splatoon), Light Angst, Romance, Short & Sweet, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Whump, agent 3 got hurt and agent 8 is a caring girlfriend, because three has a potty mouth, love my agent babies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2021-01-22 17:10:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21305606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aidyr/pseuds/aidyr
Summary: Hesitantly, Three opened her eyes. Bright yellow and dull blue irises slowly moved to take in the world around her. The room was unfamiliar and unfathomably boring. Just about everything was white; white walls, furniture and equipment surrounded her mediocre white bed. The equipment was all medical, and the walls were decorated with cheesy motivational posters. There was a single potted plant in the corner, a dinky little sink, a box of latex gloves and one small window.Realization hit like a Dynamo Roller.Fuck.Three bitterly thought to herself.I’m at a hospital.Just some cute, romantic hurt/comfort with my favorite agent babies. This is unrelated to the All's Fair series.
Relationships: Agent 3/Agent 8 (Splatoon)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 48





	Luckiest Inkling in the World

She awoke to a tight feeling around her neck and a thudding pain beating at the inside of her head. Her eyes felt heavy and her body ached. She shifted under scratchy linens with a tired groan. Her throat felt dry— like she hadn’t had anything to drink in days.

_What the hell happened…?_ The inkling silently wondered. Cod, everything hurt.

Hesitantly, Three opened her eyes. Bright yellow and dull blue irises slowly moved to take in the world around her. The room was unfamiliar and unfathomably boring. Just about everything was white; white walls, furniture and equipment surrounded her mediocre white bed. The equipment was all medical, and the walls were decorated with cheesy motivational posters. There was a single potted plant in the corner, a dinky little sink, a box of latex gloves and one small window.

Realization hit like a Dynamo Roller.

_Fuck._ Three bitterly thought to herself. _I’m at a hospital._

She pulled in a deep breath a briefly contemplated sitting up. Luckily she was able to notice how particularly sore she felt in the abdomen area before it was too late. Sitting up might’ve been a bad idea. Sighing with deep disdain and irritation, she tried to remember what had happened to land her here.

She remembered being on a mission. She remembered kicking lots of Octarian ass (as per usual.) Let’s see… she remembered… a ledge. She remembered an Octosniper taking her by surprise.

Oh geez, okay. The puzzle pieces were coming together.

She remembered dodging recklessly. She remembered tripping. She remembered falling.

But she couldn’t recall anything after that.

_Okay,_ Three told herself, _let’s see how badly I fucked up._ She lifted a hand and grabbed at the cheap sheets draping her body. She noticed her claws were unsheathed and worried how bad it might be to have made her body go into — and stay in — defensive mode. Taking a moment to unsheathe her claws, she prepared herself. She gripped the covers and pulled.

_Oh._ Three raised an eyebrow as she studied her bandaged torso. _Well… It could be a lot worse,_ she thought. Dry green ink stained the bandages, but it didn’t appear to be anything she couldn’t recover from. She’s certainly had worse happen in the field.

As that thought entered her mind, the right side of her face began to itch. The dim blue scar that covered half of her face was a constant damnable presence in her life. She hated the thing more than the Inklish language was equipped to describe. If she had to choose one incident to call “the worst thing that's ever happened in the field,” it’d probably be getting her brain molested by sci-fi mind control slime. She was reminded of it every time she looked her discolored face in the mirror, every time someone asked about the scar or artificial heterochromia. Speaking honestly, phone-bot and the entire DeepSea Metro could eat an entire bag of dick for all Three cared. That fiasco had brought nothing but inconvenience and suffering to her life.

Or… well… 

_Okay…_ Three thought, _that’s not be entirely true._

“Three!” As if on cue, one of the best things in the inkling’s life burst tearfully through the door. An octoling of tan skin, fuchsia ink and adorable round eyes stumbled quickly to Three’s bed. “Cod, I tried to visit sooner but the jerks at the front desk wouldn’t let me in until just now. I’m so so so happy you’re okay!” Eight moved in for a hug but stopped herself just short of enveloping Three in a tight embrace. “Wait, are you too hurt? Can I hug you? Or should I give you some space?”

Three snickered at her girlfriend’s anxious energy. “I think I’ll be fine if you’re gentle.”

Eight offered Three a soft smile before briskly making her way over for a hug. “You had me so worried, Three. You promised me you’d be more careful on the job.”

Three sighed and shrugged into the Octoling’s caress. “Yeah but shit happens, y’know?”

Eight frowned and pulled away. She looked at Three with narrow, serious eyes. “Three, you were literally impaled for Leviathan’s sake. Don’t be a smartass, I’m… I was so scared, Three.”

Three blinked. “Impaled? Seriously? Holy fuck.” She looked back down at her bandages and winced. Well… that definitely explained why she was so damn sore. “What happened?” She asked. “Other than… being… y’know… skewered.”

Eight’s eyes followed Three’s own to the inkling’s bandaged core. “I don’t really know specifics.” She said solemnly. “Marie spared me the gory details, but apparently you fell off a ledge and onto a pointy rock. It missed everything vital and you’ll be good as new within a month or so of rest, but…” Eight looked at Three with tears in her eyes. “You very easily could’ve… I-I mean… Just a few inches to the side and…”

Yeah… Inklings may be resilient. But not even they can recover from a jagged rock through the hearts. It sent a cold chill through her entire body to imagine what might have happened if luck hadn’t been on her side. “Hey, hey…” Three moved slowly and carefully to cup Eight’s face with her hand. “I’m okay, yeah? It could’ve been pretty bad but… I’m here.”

Eight sniffled and leaned into Three’s delicate touch. “What if next time you aren’t as lucky?”

“Eight,” Three spoke softly with a smile. “I’m the best agent Squid Beak has ever seen. Yeah, so I goofed up this once. I promise I won’t make such a rookie mistake a second time.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Well…” Three’s cheeks flushed light green with a sheepish blush. “I can’t up and die on the cutest girl in Inkopolis can I? I can’t kiss you if I’m dead.”

Eight giggled lightly. “Three you dork. No flirting, we’re having a serious moment.”

“I am serious!” Three insisted. “I don’t know what you see in an asshole like me, but damn it, I have you and I’m fucking keeping you! I can’t die after the universe gave me the greatest gift ever. What a waste that’d be.”

Eight giggled once more, her cheeks beginning to burn with flustered ink. “O-okay, okay I got it.” She grinned at Three and it made the older agent’s hearts flutter. “You’re silly.”

Three returned Eight’s affectionate simper. “Maybe I am. Can I have a kiss now?”

“Of course.”

Eight brushed Three’s tentacles out of the way and leaned down to connect their lips for a kiss. Three knew her mouth must’ve been dry and her breath far from appealing, but Eight didn’t seem to mind. In fact, she just seemed relieved to be able to kiss her favorite inkling at all.

Three breathed happily into the kiss and wondered for the millionth time what she did to deserve such a blessing. As stupid and terrible at the DeadSea Metro might’ve been, Agent 8 was one hell of a silver lining if ever there was one.

When they inevitably parted, Three watched Eight smile and shift forms. Her tan, muscular body became small, squishy and adorable as she changed from octoling to octopus

Three chuckled at her girlfriend’s cute octo-form and asked curiously, “Whatcha doin’ there?”

Eight scooted up against Three’s side and beamed. “I wanna cuddle. But I was afraid I might hurt you if I didn’t change forms.”

“Ah, gotcha.”

Eight nodded as best she could in the body of a small pink octopus. She moved diligently up against the nape of Three’s neck. “I’m going to take a nap. These past few days have been stressful. I’ll have to leave when visiting hours are over, though. Wake me up in a couple hours, okay?”

Three hummed in agreement. “Of course.”

Within minutes, Eight had dozed off. Three watched her girlfriend’s adorable little face as she slept. The sight sent butterflies to her tummy and ecstatic joy to her chest. She was sure that in this moment, despite her injuries, despite the pain, despite any and all unfortunate happenstance… she must’ve been the luckiest inkling in the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading. :)
> 
> I've been meaning to post another Splatoon story lately and, well, here it is. I said so in the description, but I'll say it again here, this isn't a part of the All's Fair continuity. I just wanted to write a cute hurt/comfort story.
> 
> I have a few ideas for future Splatoon stories (a couple of which I've started working on.) But those will probably have to wait till I finish the Um Jammer Lammy stuff I'm writing. Awkward guitar sheep is baby as fuck and deserves way more love. Just look at her!! 
> 
> https://ibb.co/RTn0mnL  
https://ibb.co/Zfy7F43
> 
> Okay whoops, excuse the lammy fangirling. Anywho, thanks again for reading. Till next time!


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